"Infidelity is simply defined as the breaking of trust and the keeping of secrets in an intimate partnership." -Rob Weiss, MSW

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Will He Ever Leave His Wife For You?

By Virginia Gilbert, MFT
@VGilbertMFT

You didn’t mean for it to happen. And it’s not just about sex. The emotional connection between you is potent, the kind of intimacy you’ve been craving your entire life. The only thing coming between you and your soul mate is that someone else thinks he’s her soul mate, too — his wife.

He assures you he’s leaving her. He’s just waiting for the right time. He needs to deal with some financial matters, or get his youngest into college, or see her through her father’s illness. (more…)

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Are Christians More Likely To Cheat?

The relationship between infidelity and religion might seem obvious at first. Surely all religions view cheating and adultery as wrong, right? It turns out that there are some variations in rates of infidelity and religious infidelity. The research is limited, but non-academic surveys have found that Christian daters (more…)

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Are Some People Hardwired For Sex?

Sex addiction will always be a controversial subject. Addiction itself is controversial, with some people still believing it to be a moral failing and a matter of choice. Addictions that involve a behavior rather than a chemical substance will always be more difficult to define, diagnose and explain, and sex addiction is no exception. Recent research is adding more fuel to the debate with the finding that some people are hardwired to desire more sex than others. It raises the question: Is this the basis for sex addiction? (more…)

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The Female Love Avoidant

Hailey’s relationship with her mother was often tense, but for things to go smoothly, the 32-year-old had to do a lot of pretending. She still needed her mother, or believed she did, and so she had become a master at pretending. She had never confronted her mom about the incest, and had never asked questions about any of the other painful things her mom had allowed to happen to Hailey—though, of course, both women knew. (more…)

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Sex Addiction: Full Disclosure – Coming Clean In Getting Clean

In the inevitable moment when a sex addict is finally caught by his partner, it can feel like the sky is truly falling, that the ground is caving in. Having his secret life discovered engages simultaneous relief and defensiveness. A sex addict may be glad to finally have the weight of his lies lifted (it’s been exhausting to tell so many), but is terrified of abandonment. And that means he’s almost certainly (more…)

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The Psychology Of A Sex Addict

There are many ways in which sex addiction can manifest. Some addicts need to have random hook ups with strangers, while others use pornography to meet their needs. Some are addicted to self-pleasure or a particular fetish, while other sex addicts crave the voyeuristic attention of others. Behind all the varying behaviors of sex addiction is the psychology of the addict. (more…)

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Is Flirting A Sign Of Sex Addiction?

Sex addiction can be devastating to relationships. When one partner becomes obsessed with the act of sex, it can lead to cheating and affairs, compulsive use of pornography and other unhealthy behaviors. If you are concerned that your partner may have an issue with sex, you should seek professional help. If the reason you’re worried is because your partner is flirting a lot, you may or may not have a valid reason to be concerned. (more…)

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The Jian Ghomeshi Sex Scandal: An Abuse Of Power

By Virginia Gilbert, MFT
@VGilbertMFT

What’s disturbing about Jian Ghomeshi, host of the popular Canadian show Q who was recently fired during a storm of sexual assault allegations, isn’t that he liked kinky sex. What’s disturbing is that he justified his abuse of women by attributing his egregious behavior to consensual BDSM practices.

Each of the eight women who’ve come forward with details of their relationships with Ghomeshi (more…)

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Sex Addicts As Codependents?

Stop right there, you might be thinking. Aren’t sex addicts like narcissists—the ones who always manage to get involved with codependents? Surely they aren’t codependent themselves. How could a sex addict be codependent (more…)

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New Survey Investigates Porn Addiction And Its Impact On Marriage

Addiction to pornography is a serious issue, particularly with the widespread availability of explicit material via the Internet, and a new survey commissioned by Proven Men Ministries reveals some interesting findings about how common pornography use may be and the potential for (more…)

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