Just the simple fact of catching your partner cheating is shocking, but there are some surprising things about infidelity that you probably didn’t know. Cheating is rarely as straightforward as you would hope.
It is a complex situation because it involves humans and our emotions, desires and needs. Believe it or not, scientific researchers are interested in our motivations and the consequences of infidelity.
Here are five of the surprising facts they have turned up.
Shocking Facts About Cheating
- Cheating may be in your genes. It sounds like the perfect excuse, doesn’t it? Of course it’s not that simple. Most things involving our genes are complicated. Research has shown that having a cheating parent can make you more likely to cheat on a partner, which may have pointed in the direction of genetics as a culprit. Now we have the hard facts. There is a gene called DRD4, which is related to dopamine receptors in the brain. Dopamine is our pleasure chemical, so you can see the connection. A study that surveyed 181 young people about sex found that those with a certain variant of the DRD4 gene were more likely to have one-night stands and to cheat.
- Young people classify online flirting as cheating. For those of us from an older generation, the online world is fraught with contradictions and complexity. Is flirting online cheating? We may not be sure, but according to a poll, young people are. Eighty-eight percent of young women and 77 percent of young men say it’s cheating just to flirt online, never mind stuff like sexting and porn use.
- Deep-voiced men are thought to be cheaters. Women love a man with a deep voice. We all know this, but researchers have proven it with scientific studies. The contradiction, though, is that while women are more attracted to a deep voice, they also suspect these men of being unfaithful. Apparently women want sex with deep-voiced men but don’t consider them worthy of long-term, committed relationships.
- Cheaters aren’t going after better looks. While we would like to think that cheating is as simple as a biological urge, that a man sometimes just can’t help himself when an attractive female is on offer, in most cases this isn’t true. Surveys have shown that most men who have cheated do not find the person with whom they had the affair more attractive than their partner. This backs up the idea that infidelity is often complicated and not always easy to explain.
- Cheating men put themselves at risk for heart attacks. Yes, men who cheat are more likely to die than those who are faithful, but not because of crimes of passion. Research has shown that men who cheat are more likely to have a major cardiovascular event. The current study can’t explain the result but suggests that men who are maintaining an affair experience more stress from keeping secrets, from keeping a second woman happy and from having a guilty conscience. The physical demands of sex, often with a younger woman, could also help explain the finding.
Infidelity is not a simple black-or-white issue. It involves our emotions, our needs and our guilt and gets very complicated. Knowing more about cheating, why it happens, what motivates people to have affairs and how it impacts everyone can help us learn to have better and more satisfying relationships. If you have experienced cheating, know that you were not to blame and that the issue is much more complicated than a simple, although heartbreaking, rejection.
YOU Can Overcome Cheating – With Or Without Your Partner.
YOU Are Worth It!