The most effective way to catch a partner online is to hire a professional detective service to do it. These specialists have state-of-the-art equipment that can hack into any computer, and it usually takes them only a few days to gather indisputable evidence of Internet cheating.
That said, the following do-it-yourself techniques have worked for many people who suspect their partners are cheating on them online.
- Google your partner’s name and see how he presents himself online. Is he calling himself “single” on Facebook? Does he have a variety of single friends of the opposite sex? You probably will need to set up a fake Facebook account to do this. Check out his single friends’ profiles, especially to see if they post pictures of the two of them on dates. Many cheaters have more than one Facebook account – the one that their partners know about and the one they use for cheating.
- Try googling any user names that you know she uses in her email accounts, chatrooms, eBay, or other websites. What is “prettylady72” up to on the ‘net?
- If you find that your partner is registered in certain chatrooms and social websites, this could be your next step. You will need a computer that your partner does not use, such as a public one at the library or one at a friend’s house. Register in one of the chatrooms where you know he has been frequenting. Use an assumed name, and then flirt with him. Be sure to ask him, “Are you married or in a relationship?” If he says no, then you have a clue what he is up to.
- Try checking her name on various websites designed specifically to find cheaters and warn others about them. Some of the best ones are “Liars, cheats and bastards,” “Cheaterville,” “Playerblock,” and “Spokeo.com.” People post stories on these websites about how they were betrayed and why others need to steer clear of certain people. They also post the real names of cheaters who hurt them, and some of their stories are heartbreaking. “Don’t Date Him, Girl” is a site for women only featuring the profiles of male cheaters.
- Buy yourself some spyware originally designed for parents to spy on their teenagers. This spyware usually costs upwards of $50 to $100, but it records everything downloaded and typed into any computer. This technique can be done within a few minutes. You simply pay for it and then download it to your computer, and it enables you to read everything (including porn) that your partner is keeping to himself and everything he writes in emails or on social websites. You have to make sure that your spyware will not be deleted by any programs on your computer that take out viruses and hackers.
- Print out all incriminating emails, conversations in chatrooms, and every bit of evidence of cheating that you find. Keep your evidence in a locked place, and maintain a journal of dates and times.
- If you suspect your partner is not only cheating on you online but also having a physical affair, you can use this easy way to record her phone conversations if you share a landline. Just maintain a secret phone in a secret place in your home and press the record button to record all conversations.
- If you do not share a phone line, try hiding a baby monitor in the room where he takes his phone calls. Be sure and test your monitor by playing a radio in the room on low volume. If your monitor successfully records the radio show, it should pick up his secret conversations.
- Your most significant challenge will be what to do with your evidence. If you show it to your partner, she will deny it and get angry that you spied on her. Are you ready to present it to a marriage counselor or divorce lawyer? Some people find out that it was better when they did not know for sure that their partners were cheating, and others are relieved when they finally confirm their suspicions were correct.